Faith

I have faith that God's going to make everything all right. Yup. Mid-year exam was minor screwup indeed, small liddle itty bitty incy wincy spider crawling up the water spout, waiting for the rain of my super determination and exam-savvy to drown it and flush it down the loo!! (You see, the spider represents all the screwups, which i have decided to believe are minor and insignificant, and the rain represents all the other stuff i do to make up those errors! But of course you knew that, why am i telling you this for?)

Yup, ive prayed about it, and i have faith. I'll just "leave it to God". Cause God decides whatever that's best for you and i! So for all you people who're wondering about what's gonna come out of these damn O levels chinese paper, just say a little prayer, and leave it to God. :P

(okay beishan getting all reflective there and stuff.)

I cant wait for this to end! a few more hours to go! (you!you! stop reminding me i've still got my other papers to sit for) *deranged pulling out of tufts of hair*

Here's a little food for thought.. do the O Levels really matter? Yeah they're useful for getting into college or further education institutes and for a scholarship and all, but i doubt they'll count for much in the real world.. perhaps A Levels is the impt one. i guess your potential employer's going to be more interested in your 1st class honours rather than your 6 points.. (still, i WOULD like a set of nice grades, and stop bluffing, so would you!) Yeah, but personally, i think O Levels is more a "i believe i can do it so i wanna prove it" kind of thing, just would like to prove that, in Eminem's words, "you can do anything you set your mind to" Yup. Its possible and i WILL do it. *growl* (stop lying stop lying) What are your views on the dreaded Os, dear reader?

A thought into the future: I have more or less these choices: 1)work hard, get into sajc and proceed to university to get a medicine degree or something. and i can jolly well be my nurse. 2) study hard as well, get into tp or nyp and take up nursing course. be sent to a hospital and start working. 3) get into any poly. slack my way through. after graduating, work super hard to get into ocs and get a life there. 4) listen to my parents following my brother's footsteps: fly to melbourne, one year of college then university.

jeremish 29:11 says "For I know the plans i have for you, declares the Lord, plans to proper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." hmm. (:

molested

i'm really offended. super pissed. gosh. i'm molested. touched my this old freaking ti ko pek! argh. i'm getting all sick. whats your problem? whats your problem? i cant believe such things would happen to me. hey uncle, can you please control your hormones? wanna do such things, go get home and find your wife okay? dont pick on any girls out on the street. under law. this is what you call outrage of modesty. go get a life alright?

I've been thinking about the good old days
Decorated in a candy glaze
Each pretty ink blot panel
Tells a different tale
Each photo on the mantle
Sweet memories that never will go stale

I've been climbing up the walls again
Living with a memory that might have been
So pick me up on a weekday night
We could get together and ride around in
The black and white

I've been thinking about the good old days
My silly clothes and my silly ways
Each drunken drugstore purchase
Each chemical advance
Seven days a weekend
Every day the same old dizzy dance

Here's something every singapore sec 4 kid can identify with: the feeling of dread which hangs over you like a dark cloud from the moment you wake up every morning. "Oh no, I've got one less day to study for chinese O's!" Or when you're watching your favourite show in a sunday afternoon (sinfully guilty, because indulgence is the only way you can reward yourself before a week of studious fight) "oh no, only 8 hours left of freedom.."

Its now 9.48pm, which means i have 1 hour 12 mins to go before burying myself into those books again. Technically, the 1 hour 12 mins count for nothing since dread dread dread fills them, making them as unenjoyable as mugging itself. Sucks man. Havent felt this low in a long while. Maybe it is because i know there will be a mock paper tomorrow. Mayeb its because i know i've not yet touched my work. Maybe its because ive got to give flyers tomorrow. Maybe its because i know next week will suck.

Why will it suck? Because next week, dear reader, is Mugging All Out. The name itself conveys images of no sleep, heavy loads, big piles of worksheets, mock paper every day, pens running out of ink, heat rash inducing, pulling of hair, Revision, revision and more revision. Ahhh sucks.

But then again, once this week is over, once chinese O's is over, there's lots to look forward to. Hmmm mmm. Pray for me, dear reader, as i throw myself straight into the throng, discover new levels of shaggness, overcome new obstacles aplenty, wrestle with the best and worst of the human spirit, and most importantly, attempt to force down new informations from different exam papers!

I shall lead, i shall excel, i shall overcome (hey, isnt that a familiar motto? hahah), i shall survive, and i shall be back to blog of my tales! For they call me.. Van Helsing.
*music plays in the background*

wahahaha! im going nuts. Seeya!

i'm starting to love this.

she chose to walk alone.
though others wondered why.
refused to look before her,
kept eyes cast upwards,
towards the sky.

she didn't have companions.
no need for earthly things.
only wanted freedom,
from what she felt were puppet strings.

she longed to be a bird.
that she might fly away.
she pitied every blade of grass
for planted they would stay.

she longed to be a flame.
that brightly danced alone.
felt jealous of the steam
that made the air its only home.

some say she wished too hard.
some say she wished too long.
but we awoke one autumn day
to find that she was gone.

the trees, they say, stood witness.
the sky refused to tell.
but someone who had seen it
said the story played out well.

she spread her arms out wide.
breathed in the break of dawn.
she just let go of all she held...

and then she was gone.